Categories: Funnies
May 6, 2016
| On 4 years ago

Samson: Make Exhaust Great Again

Haha, this (newsletter?) from Samson Exhaust is funny.

Press Release: Listen to me. Samson is the best in the business, and nobody knows business better than I know business.

Nobody does exhaust better than Samson. Nobody, believe me. Samson Exhaust? It’s unstoppable. No question. Everybody knows it.

These other Exhausts? They’re coming around, and we don’t know who they are. Do we want these weak brackets hanging around, breaking off our bikes? For all we know they’re part of ISIS.

If you start using Samson Exhaust, those other Exhausts? They’ll be gone very, very quickly. Nobody wants them, believe me.

To our friends and allies, I say that Samson will make Exhaust great again. I promise you. I promise you this.

Now that anybody can install Samson Exhaust, there are celebrations! They’re dancing in the streets! There’s happiness. Look out on the street, all you see are smiling faces. Smiling faces everywhere. Samson Exhaust is very, very compelling. Very good.

I think what you’re going to see is some media coverage too. People are starting to realize – and I’ve always said this – that Samson is the real deal.

Thank you. Thank you very much.